Family 1000 strong

First off I had to take a breather from writing. I got caught up in the unimportant stuff - you know the nonsense that makes your head spin and makes for a crappy session of dizziness for the next few minutes. Well, it's been a month and a few day's since my last posting, I believe I grew up and matured alot more than I would have liked to within the past month. I lost the silly swagger that comes with being the awesome aunt. I am now the aunt, sister, cousin, niece, and granddaughter that everyone looks up to and depends on. This past weekend proved that we as a family of more than 1000 can gather as one and embrace each other without letting go in fear that moments like this can be lost in an instant. Our family triumphed in love, happiness, and strength as we enjoyed each others company and introduced the newest members of the family to the rest of the Cedar Clan. However, we were also tested as a family, to see if the characteristics that define and bind us through blood will suffice and conquer what would be happening next, the life of a baby was taken before the end of this blessed day, we made it through with more fight than we ever had before, we pulled through for one another, we grieved each others pain, we held one another up and above all Love does heal the aching heart in time. My father gathered the cousins and his children and offered the most humble and pleading prayer, a prayer that I will remember for eternity, because I do believe that families are a blessing and the most sacred gifts we are given by our father in heaven, we are eternal. I am thankful for the time I spent away from this blog, the break has allowed me to see who I am, and what I am. I am also proud to belong to the Cedar Family, I know that my grandparents welcomed home this precious child and eased our pain. Until next time. Take care of one another, remember family no matter how difficult will be your saving grace.

PAST 90mph

I must say that I absolutely love, love, love, love DANZIG, it's the soundtrack of my youth.  I really should be grown up by now but nope I'm the person that pulls every stinking white hair out from my scalp, who cares if there are patches of baldness on my pretty little head, at least you wont see no gray.. hahahaha. Can you see me literally laughing like some kind of lame ass idiot? I miss being careless and wreck-less, there are so many limitations that come with being a parent. I feel I must buy some insane ugly Holiday sweater to kick off the holiday season, Turkey sweater, anyone?  Sorry, but I'm not a lame ass idiot nor am I some chick who gives in and sells my wild soul to the devil in trade for some kind of suburban mommy persona..ummm ewwww. I live in t-shirts, levis and my combat boots when I'm not at work.  I have enough decency to switch out the boots for a decent pair of black ballet flats for my 8-3:30 gig.  Now, on to my story - work conjured up some rather interesting overheard type of news -I found out my kid, the football jock has girl admirers who swoon over him- enough for him to be the topic for a group of girls today, little did they know he was my kid. Poor Girls, I so wouldn't let you come close to my kid!. Sorry, now get to steppin. Lastly, my daughter who just turned 17 this past weekend will be graduating from high school in May 2012 - she has no desire to amuse herself with the constant bickering, gossip, boys, that make a high school a high school, I suppose she's better than that. So, she's finishing a year early, were off to NYC in May - because that's what mama promised her.  Dear Big Apple, we will be there in May !!

Now that's how you do it!

Being the authority while the contracted full time authority figure takes leave for whatever happenstance reason is really making me assess the character that resides within me. The details of this week did not nudge nor push me it kicked me straight into a some kind of funky tripped out magical mirror carnival house kind of thing.

Let me tell you the life of a sub teacher offers no peace of mind, yet it corners you and your fate lies with kids who aren’t old enough to make educated decisions. You go to work one day – excited to be the prime example of goodness, - you know the bitchin sub everyone likes, well – well – well – so not the case.

My intentions to motivate children to do their homework in order to become an educated productive member of society has been thrown in my face – the kids counter reacted and threw their gauntlets down.  They weren’t having any kind of person telling them education will save you from the hells of government assistance, and ignorance.    

What is a person supposed to do? I’ve considered walking out mid-class and throwing my name tag to the front door of the office which led me to the classroom in which everything I have been taught and believed in went out the door (RESPECT AND yeah RESPECT) The environment of saintly kids who only say kind words to each other and respect adults was close to non-exist except for the angelic faces and personalities of few.

The curve threw me into a zone I had never treadled on- disciplining another persons child - first I was using kindness and Christlike mannerisms to settle them down - that didn't work - now the ugly - I was forced to react in a not so nice manner resulting in suspensions, ISS and the principals office. The result to writing kids up- was them retaliating, can you hear them shouting in unison “she’s the mean sub” – uumm Hello, I wouldn’t have dished out that healthy dose of discipline if you were only listening. So, off to the principal’s office you went. Sorry, but I wish we really could have gotten along; you seem to be a nice kid.

That was the week before last, then I devised a plan – hahahaha – poor kids didn't see this coming.  The game “Are you smarter than a fifth grader” was my saving grace hahahaha, I’m literally laughing at this point – my plan was to show them that they really aren’t SMART, as we know ALEC doesn’t go solo.  

The end result after playing were those same problem kids now think I’m the bomb, kewl (finally they see what I’m all about), and to  top it all off (throw that fruit cup to the side) I have been praised by parents who have personally thanked me for showing their children that education is extremely important to the productiveness of their future.  One parent said“My son really likes it when you sub because you’re the first sub-teacher who has actually motivated him to learn” 

Respect has been re-established and the natural order of humanity has been restored -  
NOW THAT’S WHAT I’M TALKING ABOUT!   
I can pat myself on the back and revel in my successes

(sshhh, the game required a little incentive in order to achieve cooperation, a bag of Halloween candy was my arsenal )

Definitely

"My real self wanders elsewhere, far away, wanders on and on invisibly and has nothing to do with my life."

 Excerpt taken from Herman Hesse's "Siddartha" novel.